I don't know how to deal with my life.

http://my.clevelandclinic.org/disorders/Back_Pain/hic_Psychological_Factors_of_Chronic_Back_Pain.aspx

Interpersonal support

It is natural for others to become frustrated with a person's chronic pain. Endless complaints and irritations naturally drive away others, especially those who feel their efforts at support are not appreciated. Therefore, the chronic pain patient must make special efforts to foster and maintain their social supports by expressing gratitude and flexibility whenever possible. Caregivers must be wary not to become frustrated at their patients' lack of progress and to respect pain patients as important individuals.

I feel awful about everything. Maybe not everything. But at least me. I feel awful about me.

Sometimes it hurts enough to cry, and other times I just can't stop crying. This can't be fucking normal, right?